What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Do you enjoy cheating on your spouse? If so, why?

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Why do Muslims invade Western society?

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Make Nazis afraid again!

Time (physics): Who started counting our current time or is it just "set" by some scientific measure?

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

What do you do when you are struggling to fall asleep?

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Tectonic plates can spread subduction like a contagion — jumping from one oceanic plate to another - Live Science

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

What is the gayest experience you have seen in prison?

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Why do I smell bad even though I have good hygiene?

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

What is your age now, and what age do you prefer to stay at forever?

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

TEXT:

How would you respond to Rep. Nancy Mace's claim that the GOP platform is more in line with what the American people want compared to the left?

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

What is the reason that Worcester, Massachusetts is not as well-known as Boston and Springfield, even though it is a large city with many neighborhoods?

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.